The Fatherhood

Fatherhood must be one of the most thankless job in the world. In any sop or comic strip a father is portrayed as bald, pot bellied, slightly dumb fun killer. He will disapprove your clothes, your sense of fun, your hang outs and your girl/boy friends.

I had a childhood like most of the kids around. We were three siblings and as money wasn’t a lavish commodity, everything had to be utilized to the maximum.

Until my pre-teens Dad was the super hero. But he had this problem of going over board when it came to disciplining or advising. It’s not that he beat us around but he had this strange ability to irritate.

As you enter your teens, a slight wisp of moustache appears. Everyday you check in the mirror for its progress. It’s not just the face, hair appears in all ungodly areas. You find out that the women you have been seeing in TV give you strange sensation and you find it difficult to control some your private parts.

Moreover the hormones start playing games with your mind. There develops a fancy notion of adulthood and hence a sense of equality and freedom. You question your dad and it gets more and more vocal. You write out a thesis on ‘How to be a better Dad’. Overnight, he gets thrown down from pedestal of invincibility. He is your no. 1 enemy now. This , like many other boys, is my story too.

As I enter adulthood, marriage and family looms in distant horizon (I am not much fond of the prospect). I ask myself ‘How can I do better than him?’ Strangely I find out that I won’t be much different. Just as someone said, I will grow up to be my Dad after all. If any rebel teen is reading this the only one thing I have to tell you is: Wisdom takes some time to arrive. So sit tight and wait.

We have a camp for the youth every year. The last session is ‘Sharing session’. There was P who was the ultimate joker in our group. He stood up ‘I don’t know if you guys will be surprised at what I am going to say. I used to boil with rage on my dad. He never allowed me to be myself or pursue my dreams. He even barred me from participating in the State level athletics. I abused him publicly and used to shower expletives on him. I want him to know I am sorry’. You may not feel anything much on reading this but that day there was no single pair of dry eyes in the room.

I am sure you guys would have interesting encounters with your dads.

This post is dedicated to a brother-sister duo who are my good friends. During the initial days she was the one who encouraged me in blogging, making me believe I have a huge fan following in her college. These two filled our lives with so much fun and laughter. The mother used to load us with all sorts of food. I remember the birthday celebration we had last year. A few days back their dad was diagnosed with a terminal illness. I pray that almighty will give them the courage to face it and moreover I am sure that some miracle is about to happen and the Dad is going to get well.